RPG Horror Story: Hanging Up On Gustav

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That Hello Adventurers, the podcast for
role players and game masters to help level

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up your game. We already dungeon
masters Jason Portiso, Joe McCall, and

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Jim Crocker. Today we'll take a
little let's take a little break and just

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tell some stories. Today we got
a horror stories send to us by a

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listener. So before we get to
this story, let's let's clear the air

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a little bit because I want to
hear your guys' stories. I want you

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guys to send us stories. You
could send us your story a Hello Adventures

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podcast at gmail dot com. So
before you go ahead and tell us your

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your about the time that the guy
was a creep and made older girls leave

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the stories that we want you guys
to send. What what makes a good

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story for this kind of show?
And my general rule is a really it's

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kind of a vibe thing. It
does the story past the vibe check.

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And so the things that are going
to pass the vibe check, I'm looking

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more for stories about a game that
went wrong and less about a player that

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went wrong. And today's story is
about a problem player, and we're gonna

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we're gonna cover this one anyway to
address a few things, but I want

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to hear more about your you know, the guy the guys who tried through

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homebrew a whole game based on D
and D and ends up just changing the

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whole thing, or the guy who
thought dms could bank their own inspiration and

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use them inspiration. Yeah, exactly. So like so far, those those

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two stories that we've covered really are
just like like nailing exactly what we're looking

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for. Today's episode is about a
problem player. It is it is still

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going to pass the vibe check for
today, but this is kind of the

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last time I want to do a
story similar to this one, because it

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really all it boils down to don't
be gross, and that means not only

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hygienically, don't be gross, but
also like don't be a gross type of

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person, which this guy isn't crossing
those kind of lines, but like it's

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just all too common. And this
where we're going to kind of like point

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to the camera in the in those
like eighties very special episodes, We're going

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to like just stare down the barrel
of the camera here and we're going to

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break the fourth wall. Yea,
what is the fourth wall? In the

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podcast? For everywhere there's ever nothing
but walls. We're lousy with walls over

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here. What am I going to
do with all these walls? So this

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kind of gets me into before we
can get too the story. Let let's

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just let's just have a little chat
here, guys. So I was running

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a game this past there's a couple
of days ago at the time of this

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recording, which doesn't really matter,
but I want you to know that this

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was recent and a lot of the
games that I run are public and made

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for brand new players, and some
people have different ideas of what this game

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actually is. So I always have
a little chat with them and be like,

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hey, these are the things that
we're going to expect today, and

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these are the things that I find
completely unacceptable on my table. And some

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of them were obvious, like if
anybody tries to bring any like outside real

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world racism into the game, that's
an does an instant kick from the table

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and no refunds. And some players
try to bring in things, like,

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you know, really touchy subjects like
like sexual assault and things along those lines

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that I don't even want to like
say out loud, which some people have

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this idea in their head that that
belongs in this hobby and I think that's

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you should not allow that, even
in the slightest bit at all. We

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were going to do a whole episode
on what it's called safety tools, and

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so we're not going to get into
what those are today other than that they

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are things in place that you all
have a discussion about and make sure that

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everybody is having a good time and
nobody is made uncomfortable. The reason I

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brought that up for that particular game
was it was a horror based game,

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and I want to make sure that
people were okay with things like hanging and

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dismemberment, and like, you know, because I don't know what experiences people

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have had, and you know,
unfortunately, things like hanging is something that

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people may have dealt with, you
don't you don't know what anybody else exact

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experience. And bringing things like sexual
assault to a table in what is a

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fantasy game, it's like, first
of all, that shouldn't be your fantasy.

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Second of all, it's just there's
just no place for it here.

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So when I was telling the table
that and like, hey, listen,

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these are my hard stops. We
don't do racism, we don't do sexual

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assault, and they looked at me, they're like, is that really a

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thing that you have to like tell
people not to bring to the table.

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And I'm like, oh, my
sweet summer child. People are awful.

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Yeah, And when you bring the
wrong kind of person into a game where

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you can literally do anything, some
people are going to take that into a

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very dark place that really has no
place in this kind of game. And

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so there's other new players that think
that this is normal and will and ours

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straight away from this because of that, And it may you know, giving

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people the benefit of the data may
also be coming from like like some understanding

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of like war and trying to be
realistic. Like it's just that there's no

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place for it. You know,
if you're coming into D and D from

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say Game of Thrones, where sexual
violence is endemic to that show and often

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used as like motivation for characters and
stuff like that, it's not outrageous that

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you might think that the story might
have room for that. Yeah, exactly

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what I say. And it's just
good to put that up front there,

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to say this is not that kind
of story. It doesn't illegitimize that if

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that's the kind of story that you're
interested in, And if you get a

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table where all of you decide you
want to go into those issues. There's

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no D and D Police that are
going to descend on your house to say

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you can't do that. But certainly, like you said, Jason, in

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public where not only are you concerned
with the people at the table, but

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anybody that may be walking by the
table, you've got to calibrate also appropriate.

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And also I'm being allowed to use
the space of that place for the

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day, and now, whether I
meant to be or not, I am

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now representative of that space that I'm
using, whether it's a game store or

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brewery or wherever else I'm running games. So at my particular table and even

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on my private tables, I just
don't want to deal with that while we're

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at it. Just something you mentioned
there should be be a D and D

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piece like the town guard. Well
yeah, I'm just saying maybe there should

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be a D and D police.
Yeah, those are the those are the

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pinker Tints. And that was a
story from last year. So all that

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to say is that that, yeah, these awful, awful things do absolutely

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exist in this game, and some
of these players were like surprised that,

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like, yeah, this is this, this is a thing that we kind

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of have to like make sure that
our hobby is kept in a good light.

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Yeah, and so the reason why
I don't like hearing those stories is

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a they kind of paint us in
a bad light and be all I can

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really say about them is the same
thing over and over again. Don't do

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that. Don't be a creep.
Yeah, And like you know, if

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you if you think you're gonna be
going out in public and sharing time with

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someone, maybe make yourself presentable in
some way. I played, I played

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magic for a long time. I
think too. I think our jobs are

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to bring you content that's new and
interesting or old in it, you know,

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interesting, and that is neither of
those stories. Yeah, it's not

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interesting, it's it's it's terrible,
doesn't belong and it makes us goods.

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There's nothing new because our other job
on episodes like this one is to chime

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in on them and maybe offer some
advice. And I just offered all the

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advice that I could possibly give on
that type of story, which is just

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don't be a creep and you know, pretend that you know how to interact

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with people. That's all I ask
for. So with that out of the

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way, I bet that's just something
I wanted to address. This story is

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not quite as bad as those could
be. I will say this is probably

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the last time we're going to do
a problem player story rather than a problem

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game story. But I like that
this listener. Actually, this came in

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from a listener of our previous show, Comudgeons and Dragons, and I promised

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I was going to get to it, and then the show kind of went

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on permanent hiatus, and now it
is this show and I still want to

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get to it. But yeah,
please send us your game stories again.

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That's hello, Adventurers Podcast at gmail
dot com. Send us your stories.

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And the other thing is, so
that's content stuff. Now it's all about

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story stuff. I get people really
quick extending dms like, hey, I

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had a game where like this happened, and this happened, and that's the

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whole thing. So a story should
have a beginning, a middle, and

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an end, just like your games
do. And you know, give me,

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give you a little piazz, give
me something, give me something fun

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to read here. And it is
something that this this listener did very well.

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So I'd like to reward that.
Is there any trigger warnings for this,

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because I don't know what you're mild
or. I wouldn't say there's any

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anything particularly awful in the story.
This is just since we're talking about safety

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tools, make sure we go and
that's the that's totally fair to ask.

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No, no, this is this
isn't anything like that, And if and

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if it was, we wouldn't have
Google story, google those stories. I

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do have a hardline on this is
just just this is just rude, is

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what it is. Oh, yeah, I know about that. Yeah,

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that we can deal with rude.
I'll take Hello Adventurers, thank you so

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much for listening. If you enjoy
the show, the absolute best thing you

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can do to support us is to
subscribe so you'll be notified when new episodes

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are released. You can also leave
us a review five stars. Of course,

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that will help us get seen by
more D and D players, and

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more than anything else, just tell
your friends about us. If you like

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what we're doing here, then there's
a good chance that your DM or your

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players will enjoy it too. And
you don't need to loop gold to do

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any of that. We appreciate your
listening. Now back to the show,

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but that all out of the way. I don't want to spend the whole

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story telling you what not to do. Let's let's have a story that teaches

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us what kind of what not to
do. Listener that goes by the name

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gelatinous GM and I did ask nicely, and we can call them Jelly Jelly

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Rights. I moved to a new
state roughly six months ago from across the

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country. Now they sent the story
like a year ago, so they're pretty

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well they gotta be on box by
now. Looking for a D and D

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group, I reached out to multiple
local Facebook groups and one of the first

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people in the message me was this
player. We'll call them Gustave. No

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offense to Actually, Gustav's is just
a fun name to say. I first

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started talking to Gustav through discord while
we played computer games. They mentioned they

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had a D and D group they
were playing in, and I was hoping

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to work my way into that game. I just love the idea of like

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infiltrating like this, like this like
secret society you still play in the D

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and D game? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you need that, you

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need another Freemason? Yeah, do
you want to ask on exactly? Unfortunately,

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this is way more of a cult
than the Freemasons are. Unfortunately,

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every time I asked about their group
and if I could join their games kept

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canceling if only I knew then what
I know now. After a while,

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I met a stellar group of players
and began dming Curse of Strad for them.

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It was a small group and while
only two of the three actually participated,

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they were rock star players and I
wanted them to have a bigger group

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of more players to help out,
so I asked them if I could bring

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someone in for a trial run er
Gustav. I thought I had adequately sussed

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them out while playing video games.
I was dead wrong. We first started

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playing at a local game shop and
it all went fairly decent, aside from

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them not knowing their own character that
they had created, but no big deal.

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Me and my players would remind them
from time to time, and as

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we said in a previous episode,
this is not exclusive to this table.

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This is just the thing. But
as we got into seasonal one shots or

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potential future characters, I was getting
text NonStop from Gustav on how to build

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their character for them. Multiple attempts
were made by me to convince them to

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read the material and figure it out, as I had offered my advice and

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they didn't like it. Eventually,
I got my living situation sorted and built

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a D and D room. I
asked the group if we could start playing

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there, as it would be most
convenient for everyone as it was closer.

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They all agreed and we were all
excited to play there. Where were they

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playing? I thought they were playing
online? Possibly? Oh no, they

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he met them playing playing online and
with the existing group, I kind of

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assumed there was at the game store. Okay, sorry, I just I

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guess that may not have been explicit, but I can't imagine going from one

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we first started playing at a local
game job. Now I say, okay,

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yeah, that is there. Okay, sorry, got it. This

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section is titled The Nightman Cometh Sex
and said titles it's a cool thing.

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If you do that, title your
sections inspiration for you, Jilly. Game

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day arrived, I made food for
everyone and we all sat down the play.

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The night went on pretty normally until
Gustav mentions they didn't drive here,

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but were dropped off and their ride
was tired of waiting in the car outside.

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Let's let's let's pack Let's unpack this
for a second here, this this

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has mom vibes, but I'm not
really sure, but just it's just the

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the making your ride sit outside while
you play D and D. This isn't

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it. This isn't exactly a game
of Uno. All right, this is

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going to go off for hours mine, But these are adults rights to be.

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Even if I wasn't an adult,
there was no way my mom's waiting

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in a car outside. My wife
lives here. She really wants to stay

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here while we play games. She
has her own dice. I just doesn't

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want to play. I'm gonna bring
her on my day. We're gonna get

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it. She legit loves listening to
this story. Actually have a company over,

205
00:12:52.159 --> 00:12:54.720
so that's always cool. Anyway,
this isn't about her. This is

206
00:12:54.720 --> 00:13:00.799
about This is about waiting outside.
So their ride and they're chi old knock

207
00:13:00.840 --> 00:13:03.759
on my door? What we have
an unexpected guests and I'm expected child.

208
00:13:03.759 --> 00:13:07.600
Now I let them inside kind of
out of not knowing what to do in

209
00:13:07.600 --> 00:13:11.919
the situation. So the pronouns are
the pronouns are throwing me a little there,

210
00:13:11.399 --> 00:13:18.320
their ride and the rides child,
or the ride and the player's child

211
00:13:18.679 --> 00:13:22.320
that was out in the car with
the ride. Because of syntax and English

212
00:13:22.399 --> 00:13:26.120
language, I can't tell if okay, I mean, they're both bad,

213
00:13:26.200 --> 00:13:33.159
but one's worst. Thinking it's the
ride and the rides child, this might

214
00:13:33.279 --> 00:13:35.879
this might be the wife and his
king, and it's I think there's I

215
00:13:35.879 --> 00:13:37.799
think there's I think his wife and
kid. Yeah, because like I'm having

216
00:13:37.799 --> 00:13:41.480
a very hard time thinking of anybody
else waiting outside in the car with the

217
00:13:41.559 --> 00:13:45.519
kid, waiting for someone else to
play D and D and and again.

218
00:13:45.759 --> 00:13:50.480
English and syntax, you know whatever. Not necessarily spouse, but yeah,

219
00:13:50.480 --> 00:13:52.919
it does sound like, yeah,
partner they live with or something like that.

220
00:13:54.519 --> 00:13:56.960
I use the already. I've used
the term wife very loosely. I

221
00:13:56.960 --> 00:14:01.080
have a beance, not a wife. But that's that's neither here nor there.

222
00:14:01.360 --> 00:14:03.360
I let them in kind of out
of not knowing what to do in

223
00:14:03.360 --> 00:14:05.679
the situation. I led them into
the game room and they sat on the

224
00:14:05.720 --> 00:14:09.519
floor for an hour while we played, so I had no other seating.

225
00:14:11.279 --> 00:14:15.080
I now was upset in pressure to
wrap up so they could all go home.

226
00:14:15.519 --> 00:14:16.960
Not to mention, the child was
running up and down the stairs and

227
00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:20.919
into other rooms where I couldn't see
them, And the top of it off,

228
00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:22.480
my wife was trying to put our
kids down for the night while this

229
00:14:22.559 --> 00:14:30.240
random kid kept showing up. None
of us have even would even chime in

230
00:14:30.279 --> 00:14:33.360
with that this is we see how
uncomfortable this isew uncomfortable we are right now

231
00:14:33.320 --> 00:14:37.320
and Joe, so this is one
bad day, right, this will get

232
00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:41.039
better, right right? So before
the next time we played, I made

233
00:14:41.039 --> 00:14:45.279
sure to mention to the group that
if anyone was not driving themselves to the

234
00:14:45.320 --> 00:14:48.360
game, that I need to know
and I would let them know if it

235
00:14:48.399 --> 00:14:50.720
was okay to have them come over. Luckily, this wasn't an issue again,

236
00:14:50.759 --> 00:14:56.519
so this was a one off.
This section is called ugh the sequel.

237
00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:01.080
The next week comes around that we
all start gaming. Ag I make

238
00:15:01.120 --> 00:15:05.879
food business as usual until Gustav takes
a call mid game, does not leave

239
00:15:05.919 --> 00:15:13.080
the room and puts it on speaker. Jesus, well, what was the

240
00:15:13.159 --> 00:15:16.159
call? Who was the dog?
Who was doctor or their doctor? You

241
00:15:16.200 --> 00:15:18.879
know you think you think you mentioned
We try to play around this to be

242
00:15:18.879 --> 00:15:24.480
considerate towards the player, just they
deserve consideration. At this point, eventually

243
00:15:24.480 --> 00:15:28.679
I realized that Gustav is not going
to hang up their phone because there's significant

244
00:15:28.679 --> 00:15:35.480
other it wants to go shopping with
them while on the phone. I hate

245
00:15:35.559 --> 00:15:39.679
peoples, They're out of peace.
Should I get these peas instead. Hell

246
00:15:39.919 --> 00:15:43.039
is other people. That's true,
It doesn't it doesn't even matter what the

247
00:15:43.080 --> 00:15:48.200
conversation is. That's like, this
is this is a thing where people are

248
00:15:48.279 --> 00:16:00.879
confusing politeness for allowing chaos. Like
you can politely tell someone please take your

249
00:16:00.919 --> 00:16:03.679
call in the other rooms or hang
up, and you'd be polite about that,

250
00:16:04.399 --> 00:16:08.080
Like, you know, not being
polite about that is hang up the

251
00:16:08.159 --> 00:16:11.919
damn phone. What are you doing? That's being impolite. But you can

252
00:16:12.200 --> 00:16:18.440
absolutely enforce the boundaries and rules of
your home while being polite. And if

253
00:16:18.480 --> 00:16:23.480
people get upset about that, that's
on them because you know you were polite,

254
00:16:25.080 --> 00:16:27.879
you were courteous, and they're the
one that is like they're the one

255
00:16:27.879 --> 00:16:33.480
that is being impolite there, Yeah, Jelly, so far Jelly is a

256
00:16:33.519 --> 00:16:37.759
doormat, you know kind of That's
what I'm getting. Yeah, but you

257
00:16:37.799 --> 00:16:41.000
can you can be pleasant and stick
up for yourself. Yeah, That's what

258
00:16:41.080 --> 00:16:45.600
I'm saying, is is like how
how what? And maybe we'll find out,

259
00:16:45.600 --> 00:16:48.639
But what's the line before you stop
being quote unquote polite? Like and

260
00:16:48.639 --> 00:16:53.320
and I think that it is especially
what's a generational thing too? Write?

261
00:16:53.320 --> 00:16:59.799
I think I believe when is it
time to stop being polite and start being

262
00:17:00.360 --> 00:17:03.559
But like you know, I was
brought up to like like sorry, Joe,

263
00:17:03.720 --> 00:17:04.759
Jim, that was the most gen
next thing you could have possibly ever

264
00:17:04.799 --> 00:17:14.400
really said. Absolutely reference the kids
there MTV. Maybe it's a generational and

265
00:17:14.400 --> 00:17:17.200
it really it really might be right
because I think there's like a whole thing

266
00:17:17.279 --> 00:17:22.160
with millennials, specifically millennials and and
xennials, like elder millennials and like like

267
00:17:22.880 --> 00:17:27.240
being respectful and polite, like we
that was hammered home for us so much.

268
00:17:27.319 --> 00:17:32.039
I think that that a lot of
people of my generation and I don't

269
00:17:32.119 --> 00:17:36.119
know this person from Adam, but
we've not met, we've not met,

270
00:17:36.160 --> 00:17:40.680
but I'm gonna guess that we may
be of of a certain age and that

271
00:17:40.920 --> 00:17:44.519
yeah, like we almost let people
go too far because we think we're being

272
00:17:44.559 --> 00:17:47.279
polite. You're not being polite,
you're being a doormat. You're letting people

273
00:17:47.319 --> 00:17:49.599
walk alome for you. I see
it be pleasant. You can be pleasant

274
00:17:49.640 --> 00:17:55.000
and still stick up for yourself.
And commenting on on millennials is a completely

275
00:17:55.039 --> 00:17:57.599
different theme than this show has.
But yeah, as an elder millennial myself,

276
00:17:57.960 --> 00:18:03.880
it's less about coming off as polite
and more about not coming off as

277
00:18:03.920 --> 00:18:07.680
a burden that was something that was
kind of hammered into us, and that

278
00:18:07.799 --> 00:18:10.480
maybe that's really what I'm trying to
say. Yeah, I mean, and

279
00:18:10.519 --> 00:18:14.799
there's also, you know, there's
also very real line and a complicated space

280
00:18:15.279 --> 00:18:21.920
between inclusivity, not wanting to be
a gatekeeper, not wanting to exclude people,

281
00:18:22.759 --> 00:18:26.839
but also keeping the people that are
already part of the group safe.

282
00:18:27.039 --> 00:18:33.359
And you know, like like your
courtesy extends not just to the new guy,

283
00:18:33.839 --> 00:18:37.599
right, it also extends to the
existing table that's already there. But

284
00:18:37.799 --> 00:18:40.880
no, that's cool. So but
Jason, please continue so that we can

285
00:18:40.920 --> 00:18:45.440
hear the happy ending indicating that this
was the last session that this player attended.

286
00:18:45.519 --> 00:18:51.359
But absolutely hold on. I wish
and to what you said, Jim

287
00:18:51.480 --> 00:18:55.119
keeping the party safe and the rest
of the group safe, and because that

288
00:18:55.200 --> 00:18:59.240
means you have to throw this player
up, because he's clearly a serial killer.

289
00:19:00.960 --> 00:19:06.400
He's having conversations just on speakerphone as
if nobody else exists about shopping for

290
00:19:06.480 --> 00:19:10.759
what I assume was peace. I
made up the peace part. He's a

291
00:19:10.799 --> 00:19:15.279
sociopath at least, right, I'm
gonna I'm gonna draw the line at you

292
00:19:15.400 --> 00:19:22.960
maligning peas, my favorite vegetable.
By associating them with this behavior prefer I

293
00:19:22.960 --> 00:19:30.000
think it was like it was almost
certainly something objectively gross, like lima beans,

294
00:19:30.039 --> 00:19:33.119
Like they were talking about buying lima
beans. So in my head,

295
00:19:33.160 --> 00:19:40.039
that's that's what it is, frozen
collie flower. I politely asked Gustav to

296
00:19:40.079 --> 00:19:42.559
hang up. Fortunately they do,
and to end the night, they break

297
00:19:42.559 --> 00:19:45.880
out a pack of ritz crackers and
spray cheese and get it all over my

298
00:19:45.960 --> 00:19:49.240
chairs and floors. Maybe they were
shopping for spray cheese. I don't know,

299
00:19:49.319 --> 00:19:52.839
because he's about to run out like
an they knew not to invite this

300
00:19:52.880 --> 00:19:56.680
guy back to all as well.
It does continue now before the next game,

301
00:19:56.680 --> 00:19:59.640
I messaged the party yet again to
remind them that if they need to

302
00:19:59.640 --> 00:20:02.880
take a phone call, please step
out of the room. If it's not

303
00:20:02.920 --> 00:20:06.279
going to be quick, does it
not? Look I'm not saying this to

304
00:20:06.440 --> 00:20:14.039
Ednie, one particular person, anyone
at all. Take a phone call this

305
00:20:14.319 --> 00:20:18.279
passive aggressive bullshit. This is that's
a that's like, like we want to

306
00:20:18.319 --> 00:20:26.160
talk about generational difficulties and people being
directed. They can also just wait a

307
00:20:26.160 --> 00:20:30.680
minute. Isn't like all of the
Midwest is passive aggressive, aren't they.

308
00:20:30.279 --> 00:20:33.680
I'm even going to point out the
tag at the end of that sentence.

309
00:20:33.759 --> 00:20:36.680
If it's not going to be quick, that is a very millennial, just

310
00:20:36.680 --> 00:20:38.200
like it was not it was not
too much trouble. Could you please get

311
00:20:38.200 --> 00:20:41.759
that knife out of my neck?
That? If he couldn't please, I

312
00:20:41.759 --> 00:20:44.119
don't want to. I don't want
to be a bother. And then then

313
00:20:44.200 --> 00:20:51.240
you tip them. Then you yeah. Day three, the final straw there's

314
00:20:51.240 --> 00:20:55.440
still straws lest guys. This time
one of my players wants to try their

315
00:20:55.440 --> 00:20:59.359
hand at DM. Everyone in the
group is super supportive and excited to play

316
00:20:59.400 --> 00:21:02.960
this campaign. Everyone all came over, we got set up and started to

317
00:21:03.000 --> 00:21:07.599
play. Throughout the game, we
kept noticing a very sour, disgusting smell,

318
00:21:07.640 --> 00:21:10.839
and no one could catch where it
was coming from. No one said

319
00:21:10.880 --> 00:21:14.559
anything so as had not hurt anyone's
feelings, but multiple party members messaged me

320
00:21:14.559 --> 00:21:18.119
after the game about a smell that
and I shared some of my concerns and

321
00:21:18.200 --> 00:21:22.599
told them that it would get resolved. So I bet you nowhere or from

322
00:21:22.640 --> 00:21:26.119
whom the gaseous odors leaked from.
I went back to the D and D

323
00:21:26.240 --> 00:21:30.880
room a day after and a replaced
some old cheese was left to know ymcg

324
00:21:30.960 --> 00:21:34.279
in bag it was coming from the
chair Gustav sat in. It needed to

325
00:21:34.279 --> 00:21:40.079
be cleaned with carbon cleaner to get
rid of the smell. Before I could

326
00:21:40.119 --> 00:21:42.079
call Gustav and explain all these things
to him, letting him know they aren't

327
00:21:42.119 --> 00:21:45.720
welcome back, they had responded to
our group chat that we had shared all

328
00:21:45.759 --> 00:21:51.720
of our characters with fun names and
cool backgrounds, and they shared theirs not

329
00:21:51.799 --> 00:21:53.240
a bad character build, and I
could tell that they were trying to branch

330
00:21:53.279 --> 00:21:59.079
out creatively until I scrolled up and
saw the character's name. Gustav had made

331
00:21:59.079 --> 00:22:03.640
a play on words with the word
incognito and use a racist term for a

332
00:22:03.680 --> 00:22:07.000
marginalized group. They told us that
their character also had bling in a gold

333
00:22:07.200 --> 00:22:11.960
tooth. Come on, we called
them out immediately and kicked them out,

334
00:22:12.920 --> 00:22:15.960
so at least he has a hard
line there shares the hard line that I

335
00:22:17.000 --> 00:22:21.640
mentioned at the top of the episode. So so many things led up to

336
00:22:21.640 --> 00:22:23.440
this moment. The last one caught
us all by surprise, and in the

337
00:22:23.519 --> 00:22:26.039
end, they taught me a lot
of things to look out for and to

338
00:22:26.039 --> 00:22:33.440
not put up with. Just to
be a peacemaker so sounded like he had

339
00:22:33.480 --> 00:22:37.519
the wherewithal to learn that he was
kind of being the millennial I don't want

340
00:22:37.519 --> 00:22:41.799
to be a burden doormat and learned
from it, and hopefully he has that.

341
00:22:41.839 --> 00:22:45.240
This is a quick spinal installation that
a lot of us need when we're

342
00:22:45.240 --> 00:22:47.079
trying to be and we're trying to
be polite. It's in the name of

343
00:22:47.119 --> 00:22:52.799
being polite, you know. And
we commented on it on the way to

344
00:22:52.839 --> 00:22:55.079
the end of the story, so
like there's there's not a whole lot else

345
00:22:55.119 --> 00:22:56.839
to say, And this is one
of the reasons why I don't love bad

346
00:22:56.920 --> 00:23:03.799
player stories where there is something there
is something that I did want to bring

347
00:23:03.880 --> 00:23:07.599
up. That was a thing that
I heard at the beginning that we didn't

348
00:23:07.599 --> 00:23:12.160
really touch on, but that I
think is is actually actionable in this story

349
00:23:12.480 --> 00:23:18.400
that can help people beyond just you
know, just don't like don't invite don't

350
00:23:18.440 --> 00:23:23.000
invite jerks. But at the beginning, I forget the exactly how he phrased

351
00:23:23.039 --> 00:23:27.119
it, but he said something to
the effect of, like, we agreed

352
00:23:27.240 --> 00:23:33.039
provisionally to allow them into the game, and so when you do that,

353
00:23:33.359 --> 00:23:40.359
know what that means, communicate it
to that player and then stick to it.

354
00:23:41.039 --> 00:23:44.039
There's an adage in business. I
owned a small business for many years.

355
00:23:44.079 --> 00:23:45.640
I own my store, and this
is like one of the things that

356
00:23:45.680 --> 00:23:49.480
managers would always we'd always say to
each other's managers is slow to hire,

357
00:23:49.640 --> 00:23:53.559
quick to fire, which is to
say, if someone's not working out,

358
00:23:53.880 --> 00:23:59.000
it is best for everyone, including
that person, to say this ain't working

359
00:23:59.599 --> 00:24:02.160
you know, you want to be
somewhere else, We don't want you here.

360
00:24:02.559 --> 00:24:04.960
Let's let's end this right now,
rather than you know, spend a

361
00:24:04.960 --> 00:24:07.640
lot of time trying to trying to
work it out and figure it out and

362
00:24:07.640 --> 00:24:11.720
stuff like that, you know,
and and do a bit of vetting before

363
00:24:11.720 --> 00:24:15.720
you let people in now. Like
this guy felt that he had he played

364
00:24:15.720 --> 00:24:21.240
some video games with this person who
like clearly didn't drop any you know,

365
00:24:21.359 --> 00:24:25.920
like racist bond mops while they were
you know, chatting with each other while

366
00:24:25.920 --> 00:24:30.880
playing Fortnite or whatever it was that
they were doing. But when you say

367
00:24:30.039 --> 00:24:34.000
we're going to let you into the
game, provisionally, that should be something

368
00:24:34.079 --> 00:24:40.640
very explicit. It should like it
should mean at the end of any of

369
00:24:40.720 --> 00:24:44.480
the first three sessions, either of
us can say, yeah, it's not

370
00:24:44.559 --> 00:24:48.599
working out, sorry, appreciate you're
giving it a shot, and and you

371
00:24:48.640 --> 00:24:55.279
should make sure that that is extended
to the table, to the players as

372
00:24:55.319 --> 00:25:00.119
well, because almost certainly some number
of those players, maybe even a majority

373
00:25:00.160 --> 00:25:03.799
of them, after that first session
we're like nope, nope, nope,

374
00:25:03.799 --> 00:25:08.319
nope, nope, nope, nope. But because the DM has that social

375
00:25:08.400 --> 00:25:11.519
power and has that you know,
kind of sets the agenda. Especially if

376
00:25:11.519 --> 00:25:17.400
it's your house that you're playing at, it's going to be tough for them

377
00:25:17.440 --> 00:25:18.799
to speak up and make their opinions
known and stuff like that, and you

378
00:25:18.880 --> 00:25:23.400
got to make sure that when you
say provisional, you're explicit about that and

379
00:25:23.519 --> 00:25:27.079
what that means and then stick to
it. Now, in their defense,

380
00:25:27.640 --> 00:25:32.039
that seems to be exactly what happened
here because this was on like a three

381
00:25:32.079 --> 00:25:34.519
strike system, it seems to be. And like, you know, okay,

382
00:25:34.519 --> 00:25:38.400
the first thing with with the with
the driver and the kids showing up,

383
00:25:38.759 --> 00:25:41.799
you know, maybe maybe the ride
got messed up and maybe this was

384
00:25:41.920 --> 00:25:45.920
just like a circumstantial thing. Okay, you you talk about it, you

385
00:25:47.000 --> 00:25:48.119
let it go. And then the
next one is like, okay, we

386
00:25:48.160 --> 00:25:52.480
have a phone call thing like okay, maybe he just has you know,

387
00:25:52.640 --> 00:25:56.240
different ideas on how private a phone
call can should be let's just let's put

388
00:25:56.279 --> 00:25:59.519
a hard foot down on this one, right and so far, like no

389
00:25:59.519 --> 00:26:02.279
one's getting hurt over these things.
And he did put the phone away when

390
00:26:02.279 --> 00:26:04.000
he asked, yeah, so like
okay, so that we just have a

391
00:26:04.039 --> 00:26:07.920
couple of annoyances from here and then
and then we finally hit the brick wall

392
00:26:08.000 --> 00:26:14.079
of the hard foot racism as okay, you're done, but like so so

393
00:26:14.119 --> 00:26:17.000
pretty much how you describe like it
should go down. It sounds like that

394
00:26:17.079 --> 00:26:22.079
how one, except except it was
all vibes right, like he didn't say

395
00:26:22.519 --> 00:26:26.559
and we said, you can be
in the game provisionally, and here's what

396
00:26:26.640 --> 00:26:30.279
that means. Yes, And and
I think the other the other thing that's

397
00:26:32.160 --> 00:26:38.079
important here is that if you live
with someone and they are in that space

398
00:26:38.200 --> 00:26:44.519
while your game is going on,
and there is something happening that impacts on

399
00:26:44.680 --> 00:26:49.559
their life, they get a vote
to So the partner who had this kid

400
00:26:49.559 --> 00:26:52.200
getting in their face when they're trying
to put their other kids to bed,

401
00:26:52.519 --> 00:26:56.839
you know, they should have some
say there as well. You know,

402
00:26:56.960 --> 00:27:03.079
everybody that's affected by that should be
part of that determining whether that provisional status.

403
00:27:03.160 --> 00:27:07.839
You know, maintains or and you
can be polite, you can say

404
00:27:07.359 --> 00:27:15.480
no to people politely, but but
it's it's it's still no. That's the

405
00:27:15.200 --> 00:27:19.119
sorry. My wife would have shut
that down so fast, Like if there

406
00:27:19.160 --> 00:27:22.720
was some kid riiling my kids up
while she was trying to put them to

407
00:27:22.759 --> 00:27:26.640
better or something. Yeah, yeah, that she and that's completely would have

408
00:27:26.640 --> 00:27:30.000
been shut She's like, all right, game's over by everybody. She had

409
00:27:30.000 --> 00:27:36.640
to kick everybody out, and like
it's her house entirely the reasonable. Yeah,

410
00:27:36.680 --> 00:27:37.640
I think you got to stick up
for yourself. You got to call

411
00:27:37.680 --> 00:27:41.480
people on their stuff politely. You
know, you don't have to be a

412
00:27:41.559 --> 00:27:45.319
jernk about it to start to start
to start. Yeah, yeah, like

413
00:27:45.359 --> 00:27:48.119
hey man, you are you are? You are within your rights to escalate,

414
00:27:48.359 --> 00:27:52.640
Yeah, and to make sure that
you're and you got to make sure

415
00:27:52.640 --> 00:27:59.519
you're bringing your players into it,
because it's entirely possible that someone is can

416
00:27:59.519 --> 00:28:02.759
be you know, like we're not
going to make this about creepy players and

417
00:28:02.799 --> 00:28:07.000
stuff like that, but it's entirely
possible that someone could be an absolute gem

418
00:28:07.119 --> 00:28:11.880
at the table. But then you
know, when you're walking out to your

419
00:28:11.920 --> 00:28:15.759
cars afterwards, they say something to
one of them players. And but but

420
00:28:15.920 --> 00:28:19.640
that's it, that's all they're doing. But you got to make sure everybody

421
00:28:19.799 --> 00:28:23.799
has a say in that, because
everybody's got to live with whomever you're bringing

422
00:28:23.839 --> 00:28:29.759
into the game. So I think
that's that's all that really needs to be

423
00:28:29.839 --> 00:28:33.359
said about this. I am glad
that player is gone. And and Jelly,

424
00:28:33.400 --> 00:28:36.119
if you're still listening and we've been
in touch since, then, yeah,

425
00:28:36.160 --> 00:28:37.720
thanks for the story. This is
this sounded like a bunch of really

426
00:28:37.759 --> 00:28:41.200
annoying nights. And even then you
may have dodged the bullet. It's a

427
00:28:41.200 --> 00:28:45.319
good for you. Yeah, maybe
a literal one, who knows, but

428
00:28:45.319 --> 00:28:48.599
but yes, I think it's there's
There's not a whole lot else to be

429
00:28:48.680 --> 00:28:52.880
said about problem players. You you
make, you have a plan and things

430
00:28:52.920 --> 00:28:56.720
in place to remove a problem player, even if if it's a it's a

431
00:28:56.720 --> 00:29:00.039
friend that starts off break and then
you learn something about them later that you

432
00:29:00.079 --> 00:29:03.119
didn't know. Just like just like
Jelly, did you know you find ways

433
00:29:03.119 --> 00:29:11.039
to remove toxicity from your hobby.
Doesn't And this is the other thing,

434
00:29:11.319 --> 00:29:18.400
It doesn't even have to be toxicity. If has to be, doesn't vie

435
00:29:18.440 --> 00:29:23.240
with the group because it's not what's
that. No, I don't think that's

436
00:29:23.319 --> 00:29:26.559
toxic. It's just you don't fit
the culture, right. That's like a

437
00:29:26.640 --> 00:29:30.599
thing that you hear about in business
all the time is that it's just it's

438
00:29:30.599 --> 00:29:34.759
not a good culture fit. But
it's like, it's like finding politely.

439
00:29:36.759 --> 00:29:40.400
You can do that politely, you're
it's it is so much like dating.

440
00:29:40.920 --> 00:29:44.720
The whole point of dating is that
you find out if you're compatible, and

441
00:29:44.759 --> 00:29:48.559
if you're not, either of you
can say nope at any time and walk

442
00:29:48.599 --> 00:29:52.480
away and you're absolutely you absolutely have
that right to do that, and no

443
00:29:52.519 --> 00:29:56.079
one is a bad person because that
happened. It's it, And it's a

444
00:29:56.119 --> 00:30:00.279
lot like dating from my DA game
too, because I kiss all my players

445
00:30:00.319 --> 00:30:06.880
on the mouth. So that's called
inspiration. That's how I use inspiration.

446
00:30:07.240 --> 00:30:10.559
Let's please wrap this up here,
okay, so send us your story is

447
00:30:10.559 --> 00:30:14.359
probably a bad game story. Helloadventures
podcast at gmail dot com. You can

448
00:30:14.359 --> 00:30:17.880
tell us your story yourself, although
the voicemail is only ninety seconds, so

449
00:30:17.960 --> 00:30:21.440
either tell it really really fast or
give us the synopsis. And if you'l

450
00:30:21.440 --> 00:30:26.880
like you were on multiple times,
don't call it multiple times please, I'm

451
00:30:26.920 --> 00:30:29.440
not sifting through that. It's a
great way to have you to not play

452
00:30:29.440 --> 00:30:30.720
it, but I'll just tell us
the synopsis of your story and if we

453
00:30:30.799 --> 00:30:33.839
like it, we'll we'll reach out. But that's at Hello Adventures podcast dot

454
00:30:33.880 --> 00:30:38.599
com slash voice that is going to
do it for today. So thank you

455
00:30:38.599 --> 00:30:42.119
so much for listening to Hello Adventures. We're your host Jason Portiso, Jim

456
00:30:42.160 --> 00:30:47.160
Crocker and Joe McCall producer, editor, Engineer Jason Portiso. Music is by

457
00:30:47.279 --> 00:30:49.519
Nick S Burrier or artwork is by
Kristin Broderick. You can reach out to

458
00:30:49.599 --> 00:30:53.759
us with any pedbacker suggestions by emailing
Hello Adventures Podcast at gmail dot com.

459
00:30:53.839 --> 00:31:07.319
Hello Adventures is a JTP audio production
Good Guy by Adventurers cost U